March 7: Bush is Confused

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5:15 AM EST Friday March 7, 2008

I'mTheMan: George?

Bush43: Please, call me George

I'mTheMan: Uh,... Hi George

Bush43: Hello Senator

I'mTheMan: Thanks for the endorsement and media exposure
I'mTheMan: And especially for the wonderful White House visit

Bush43: No sweat!
Bush43: It's nothing compared to what we'll do when you clinch the nomination in Denver

I'mTheMan: Uh,... I already clinched and...
I'mTheMan: the Democrats will be in Denver

Bush43: At the same time?!?!?!
Bush43: Holy crap!
Bush43: Someone is in deep dung for not checkin'!

I'mTheMan: Sir, if I may...

Bush43: Better be quick - I gotta make some phone calls and sort this crap out

I'mTheMan: First, I have already clinched the delegate count

Bush43: That's great John!
Bush43: Why didn't you say something when you were at the White House this week?

I'mTheMan: I thought the visit was to.... uhh, nevermind
I'mTheMan: Second, The Republicans will be in Minneapolis-St.Paul

Bush43: Oh,.. so somebody already figured out the Denver mess?

I'mTheMan: At this point, I am just going to say, "Yes"

Bush43: Good thing!

I'mTheMan: You will be giving a keynote address at the convention

Bush43: I am?

I'mTheMan: Yes - it's an hour-long speech

Bush43: What can I possible talk about for a whole hour?

I'mTheMan: Many people are already asking that question

Bush43: Somebody will write something nice and put it in the scrollie thingee

I'mTheMan: The what?

Bush43: The scrolliee thingee that's in front of me when I talk to crowds or people

I'mTheMan: I believe it's called a teleprompter

Bush43: Whatever, some words will be rollin' and I'll read-em
Bush43: Anyway, exactly which city is the convention in?

I'mTheMan: Excuse me?

Bush43: You said Minneapolis - St. Paul
Bush43: I need to know which one
Bush43: My job is to tell the pilot of Air Force-1

I'mTheMan: You do what?

Bush43: When I get on AF-1, I give the destination to the pilot
Bush43: I write the secret three letter airport code on a sticky note and give it to him
Bush43: Cheney set this procedure up for me

I'mTheMan: Ahhh,.. I think I understand now

I'mTheMan: Anyway, Minneapolis - St. Paul share the same airport

Bush43: Oh Crap! This is a trap!

I'mTheMan: What?

Bush43: It's a trick John, we gotta move the convention!

I'mTheMan: Why?

Bush43: First, according to the CIA, Minnesota is a Democrat state
Bush43: Second, if Minneapolis - St. Paul share an airport...
Bush43: We are gonna get hit-up for a gazillion dollar loan to build another airport so each one has it's own airport.
Bush43: We need to outwit the Democrats by not showin' up

I'mTheMan: Mr. President, as unbelievable it is for me to say this...
I'mTheMan: In my opinion, you are WAY OVER-THINKING the situation

Bush43: Really?
Bush43: I trust your judgement, John

I'mTheMan: I need to go, sir

Bush43: Okee dokee...
Bush43: Keep me posted on the campaign
Bush43: I got a feelin' in my gut that you are going to pull it off

I'mTheMan: Uh,... thank you, Mr. President

Bush43: Later - time to play horseshoes

I'mTheMan: Bye

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